I don't want to be a downer, but I'm down

[ringsandcoffee]

I'm in denial, sort of. More like procrastination mode. I need to start my school work for the week. Planning, and then grading stuff that I've been putting off for weeks. I need to calculate midterm grades and start calling parents of students who don't do homework.

I keep having deja vu...it's starting to freak me out.

I don't see a lot of positives in my classes. I see so much struggling and helplessness that it makes me wonder if I am making any difference at all. I'm supposed to help these struggling students succeed, but many of them are not. I don't know why. Am I still assigning work above their level? Are they just not going to do anything I assign? Am I not presenting well? Do they not understand because of language barriers? What about the ones who get directions translated but still do NOTHING?

I'm at a loss. Again.

Comments

[orogenesis11.livejournal.com]

I don't know *exactly* how you feel, but I think I get the gist. That's a tough spot to be in. The question to ask yourself is, "Am I doing my best/giving it all I've got?" If the answer is yes (and I'll bet it is), you need to go easy on yourself...have compassion for yourself.

I can't imagine many jobs that are tougher than yours.

Is there another teacher who could sit in on your class and give you tips? Maybe there are little things you could do that'd make a big difference.

Or maybe you're doing better than you think you are.

[ringsandcoffee.livejournal.com]

My friend (who was also assigned as my mentor) has offered to come in and watch. She drops by occasionally and knows of my difficulties. I need her to come in, but at the same time I'm embarassed to have her see me fail (or anyone for that matter). Still, I have to suck it up and do it.

[ewanspotter.livejournal.com]

Don't be so down on yourself. Right now they may be struggling, but you'll never know the impact you've made unti later.

[ringsandcoffee.livejournal.com]

I may not know the impact until later. They may not know the impact until way later. I could just use some more immediate feedback that they're actually learning.