ringsandcoffee

My good friend K's mom (T) is terminally ill. She's had cancer for about a year or more, but I think stopped fighting it last summer. A couple weeks ago K said the cancer moved into her T's liver and so (after being told timelines before and passing them) she only had till maybe the end of March. Two weeks ago, T was spending most of the time on the couch. Today I went over for a few minutes, and there's a portable hospital bed set up where the couch was.

I tried to be thoughtful and ask how she was feeling, T just sort of smiled and answered "sick." I apologized for my stupid questions, but she laughed. Before, I knew she was sick, but she was still functional. Now, it's really obvious she's going downhill, though her spirits are still good. I don't know how K is staying so strong through all of this. Just thinking about her mom dying is sad for me, but my friend lives with it 24/7. She only works 3 days a week so they can be together more. I worry about K, and what she's going to do in a few months.

It's one thing to suddenly lose someone you love. It's another to watch someone deteriorate. I don't know how I would handle either, as the last time I lost someone close was my grandmother, but I was 9 and wasn't that affected by it. Thinking about T...well I just keep thinking how I can be there for K.