30 second memory strikes again

I think of things all day long I want to write about, and then forget them while I am checking my flist.

Ahhh, work at Sylvan last night was interesting. My first hour was fine, as I had 3 older students. Of course when I have ONE beginning reader they make me move to the BR room, grrr. Anyway, of my next 3 students, 2 I know and one I've never had. Things started bad (didn't get Austin's stuff for 10 minutes) and got worse and worse (Jarrett and Austin would not shut up and got next to nothing done). I would have been more stressed out about my director walking in on chaos but right now I really don't care. He says I'm doing fine, though I sometimes wonder if he just doesn't want me to quit. I think turnover is high around there.

Afterward, I needed to do some theraputic shopping at Target. *hugs Target* Ended up getting double chocolate soft baked cookies and a bag of milky way midnight popables. Next week I'll be sorry for eating all that junk food.

death

My good friend K's mom (T) is terminally ill. She's had cancer for about a year or more, but I think stopped fighting it last summer. A couple weeks ago K said the cancer moved into her T's liver and so (after being told timelines before and passing them) she only had till maybe the end of March. Two weeks ago, T was spending most of the time on the couch. Today I went over for a few minutes, and there's a portable hospital bed set up where the couch was.

I tried to be thoughtful and ask how she was feeling, T just sort of smiled and answered "sick." I apologized for my stupid questions, but she laughed. Before, I knew she was sick, but she was still functional. Now, it's really obvious she's going downhill, though her spirits are still good. I don't know how K is staying so strong through all of this. Just thinking about her mom dying is sad for me, but my friend lives with it 24/7. She only works 3 days a week so they can be together more. I worry about K, and what she's going to do in a few months.

It's one thing to suddenly lose someone you love. It's another to watch someone deteriorate. I don't know how I would handle either, as the last time I lost someone close was my grandmother, but I was 9 and wasn't that affected by it. Thinking about T...well I just keep thinking how I can be there for K.